It is now a duty
My crush on Sally seems to have become something other than what it started out as. Hmmm.
At first she was just a girl I was attracted to, and I as I found out later due to religion etc nothing could ever happen between us. But my crush will not go away, I keep thinking about if we were to go out on a date, what it would be like to kiss her and all the things we could do together. In my head I have built up an idealistic Sally, the perfect gal. The reality is that she is anything but perfect. I don’t get on as well with her as I do Helen and a lot of the time we seem like two completely different people. If you told me to jot down characteristics in someone’s personality that I desire, there wouldn’t be any of hers there. She can be sarcastic, moody, aggressive, loud and ignorant i.e not desirable.
It seems as though this crush has become part of a routine, something to keep my brain occupied with. When I go to work, I’m not worrying about what possible situations may arise, I’m thinking “I wonder if I’ll get to know Sally better” and when I get into to work I always take a look around to she if she is already there. It’s a very fake crush, asif something to pass the summer with. I’ll be at work everyday through the summer so I need something to think about…right? Its just short of a month before I enroll at college, I’m not going away on holiday so there is nothing that interesting going to be happening, so I have to create something….a crush.
I’m thinking about leaving work, its been good for me but sometimes you need to change the canvas on which to paint. I’m thinking about getting a modern apprentiship. I want a qualification in something basic, something I can fall back on. The beauty of going on a night time course is that my days are still free to do whatever I want. I’d like to know that in a few years in the English didn’t work out, I have other options. Work is changing now anyway, people are leaving and new starters are arriving, there were herds of them yesterday and it becomes quite intimidating.
We lost at footy last night…..6-0 and Leeds lost. Boo-hoo
At first she was just a girl I was attracted to, and I as I found out later due to religion etc nothing could ever happen between us. But my crush will not go away, I keep thinking about if we were to go out on a date, what it would be like to kiss her and all the things we could do together. In my head I have built up an idealistic Sally, the perfect gal. The reality is that she is anything but perfect. I don’t get on as well with her as I do Helen and a lot of the time we seem like two completely different people. If you told me to jot down characteristics in someone’s personality that I desire, there wouldn’t be any of hers there. She can be sarcastic, moody, aggressive, loud and ignorant i.e not desirable.
It seems as though this crush has become part of a routine, something to keep my brain occupied with. When I go to work, I’m not worrying about what possible situations may arise, I’m thinking “I wonder if I’ll get to know Sally better” and when I get into to work I always take a look around to she if she is already there. It’s a very fake crush, asif something to pass the summer with. I’ll be at work everyday through the summer so I need something to think about…right? Its just short of a month before I enroll at college, I’m not going away on holiday so there is nothing that interesting going to be happening, so I have to create something….a crush.
I’m thinking about leaving work, its been good for me but sometimes you need to change the canvas on which to paint. I’m thinking about getting a modern apprentiship. I want a qualification in something basic, something I can fall back on. The beauty of going on a night time course is that my days are still free to do whatever I want. I’d like to know that in a few years in the English didn’t work out, I have other options. Work is changing now anyway, people are leaving and new starters are arriving, there were herds of them yesterday and it becomes quite intimidating.
We lost at footy last night…..6-0 and Leeds lost. Boo-hoo
posted by A.Lee at 5:15 PM
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