Graveyard shift
After college is finished I’ll have to have a good long think about quitting my job. This week has been horrendous, I cannot think of a worse week since starting there. Before, when something crappy happened, I either A) Blew it out of proportion or B) Got over it because the people or situation redeemed itself.
This week has been different though….evil you might say. There were signs before I went away to training that it may be like this. Take today for example, Dave was a prick again. The only people who were cool with me, were the people I trained with. The rest of them have turned into something I don’t know.
Somewhere along the line, in a short space of time things have changed….everyone’s perception and interaction regarding me has been one of no respect or human decency. Not even football saved me on Tuesday.
The worst time I had at work up ‘till this point was last January. That all smoothed over though, Sam was always there and he was always on my side.
There’s no heart anymore. New faces, all of them aresholes. The team unit has been destroyed. I actually have that feeling in the bottom of my stomach that I really don’t want to go to work tomorrow morning…I’ve never had this feeling about working there before.
I almost blew the slightest hint of any misdoing at work as almost a character test of the people that work there. I would always say something like “And Sally completely ignored me and I am worried that we will drift completely apart”
The next day I would have an e-mail waiting for me.
That’s it about Sally, I had such a crush on her and I wanted more all the time. I’ve seen her the last couple of days and she hasn’t e-mailed me once or said hello. I’d focus all my worries into just that, except for the fact that a lot of the people have changed their attitudes towards me.
I’m starting to think that a rumour has been spread about me.
Part of me wants to walk away, but a larger part of me says “Wait a minute…I refuse to end things like this!”
I don’t want to walk away with another “bad memory”. I want to eventually walk away feeling that I enjoyed it there.
If we rewind over the last few months, any shit I was feeling at the time…depression, angst or worry. On our team at 8:00 at night we would have a laugh…..always. That’s why I kept working until that time because it was always a laugh and was enjoyable.
I don’t know what the hell work is now, it certainly isn’t the place I know. I didn’t fit in at my second school and I didn’t fit in at college. I had friends though, maybe not true friends, but people I could really get on well with and would help getting through the day. Work had been different, I could actually go to sleep at night without shitting the next day…that was great…but now its gone.
Tomorrow is my last day before a 2 week holiday. C’mon, lets have a good day.
This week has been different though….evil you might say. There were signs before I went away to training that it may be like this. Take today for example, Dave was a prick again. The only people who were cool with me, were the people I trained with. The rest of them have turned into something I don’t know.
Somewhere along the line, in a short space of time things have changed….everyone’s perception and interaction regarding me has been one of no respect or human decency. Not even football saved me on Tuesday.
The worst time I had at work up ‘till this point was last January. That all smoothed over though, Sam was always there and he was always on my side.
There’s no heart anymore. New faces, all of them aresholes. The team unit has been destroyed. I actually have that feeling in the bottom of my stomach that I really don’t want to go to work tomorrow morning…I’ve never had this feeling about working there before.
I almost blew the slightest hint of any misdoing at work as almost a character test of the people that work there. I would always say something like “And Sally completely ignored me and I am worried that we will drift completely apart”
The next day I would have an e-mail waiting for me.
That’s it about Sally, I had such a crush on her and I wanted more all the time. I’ve seen her the last couple of days and she hasn’t e-mailed me once or said hello. I’d focus all my worries into just that, except for the fact that a lot of the people have changed their attitudes towards me.
I’m starting to think that a rumour has been spread about me.
Part of me wants to walk away, but a larger part of me says “Wait a minute…I refuse to end things like this!”
I don’t want to walk away with another “bad memory”. I want to eventually walk away feeling that I enjoyed it there.
If we rewind over the last few months, any shit I was feeling at the time…depression, angst or worry. On our team at 8:00 at night we would have a laugh…..always. That’s why I kept working until that time because it was always a laugh and was enjoyable.
I don’t know what the hell work is now, it certainly isn’t the place I know. I didn’t fit in at my second school and I didn’t fit in at college. I had friends though, maybe not true friends, but people I could really get on well with and would help getting through the day. Work had been different, I could actually go to sleep at night without shitting the next day…that was great…but now its gone.
Tomorrow is my last day before a 2 week holiday. C’mon, lets have a good day.
posted by A.Lee at 12:33 PM
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