Not a salesman
Well I did it. I got rid of any emotion that was hovering because of Nina.
But I ask myself the question…what is left?
Well, the urge of wanting to leave this place sooner than later. Once my studies are over. Where to though? Umm, I have no idea. The only inkling I have at the moment is Newcastle and there’s only a limited connection for going there.
There was a moment yesterday where I genuinely thought me and Nina would hit it off. But it was curtailed by reality and I worked on getting those thoughts out of my head…..why Alex? Well lets grow up and say hello to the real world. She already has a boyfriend and I know that when I see her on Saturday, we won’t even say hi to each other, or I’ll say hello and she’ll respond out of politeness. And no doubt if I had continued my thoughts of hope and promise from yesterday, I would have been crushed on Saturday.
Crushed? But why are you taking this to such an extreme level? I’m not sure, it just seems to be in my character. I have faith in my personality and spirit that I warrant good things. I didn’t used to think that, I used to think I was a bad person. But now I have lost faith in the world out there, or more specifically, the people out there.
However there are quite a few top, top people hanging about. Of that I have no doubt. It just seems that a certain majority…or minority, seem intent on destroying the happiness of other people.
There are just too many unanswered questions.
What is love?
Where is my place in this world?
What is our reality?
What is my importance?
I can answer vaguely on about 3 of those.
The reason why I act so irrational and irresponsibly when it comes to love or attraction or whatever you want to call it is because in those rare moments where, if only one party, experiences a connection with that other person …it is quite simply the most wonderful thing in the world.
I’ve cracked the male sex. I’ve had extremely deep relationships with quite a few males throughout my life (I‘m not talking sexual here btw). But with women, there has only been brief instances.
In conclusion. I want the world to know that Alex Lee, despite previous entries, can see the potential of life.
It’s just a ride I guess.
But I ask myself the question…what is left?
Well, the urge of wanting to leave this place sooner than later. Once my studies are over. Where to though? Umm, I have no idea. The only inkling I have at the moment is Newcastle and there’s only a limited connection for going there.
There was a moment yesterday where I genuinely thought me and Nina would hit it off. But it was curtailed by reality and I worked on getting those thoughts out of my head…..why Alex? Well lets grow up and say hello to the real world. She already has a boyfriend and I know that when I see her on Saturday, we won’t even say hi to each other, or I’ll say hello and she’ll respond out of politeness. And no doubt if I had continued my thoughts of hope and promise from yesterday, I would have been crushed on Saturday.
Crushed? But why are you taking this to such an extreme level? I’m not sure, it just seems to be in my character. I have faith in my personality and spirit that I warrant good things. I didn’t used to think that, I used to think I was a bad person. But now I have lost faith in the world out there, or more specifically, the people out there.
However there are quite a few top, top people hanging about. Of that I have no doubt. It just seems that a certain majority…or minority, seem intent on destroying the happiness of other people.
There are just too many unanswered questions.
What is love?
Where is my place in this world?
What is our reality?
What is my importance?
I can answer vaguely on about 3 of those.
The reason why I act so irrational and irresponsibly when it comes to love or attraction or whatever you want to call it is because in those rare moments where, if only one party, experiences a connection with that other person …it is quite simply the most wonderful thing in the world.
I’ve cracked the male sex. I’ve had extremely deep relationships with quite a few males throughout my life (I‘m not talking sexual here btw). But with women, there has only been brief instances.
In conclusion. I want the world to know that Alex Lee, despite previous entries, can see the potential of life.
It’s just a ride I guess.
posted by A.Lee at 1:44 PM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home