Bye bye bye

Ben called me tonight. My mum answered and I told her to say I was at work. I haven’t talked to him in over a year since I cut him out. My stomach is all over the place now, I wish he hadn’t of called….should I call him back? For all his faults, he was one of the few people who understood exactly how I felt. We battled through the hardest times of our lives together, we were always outsiders…but outsiders together. How many true friends do you get in a lifetime? There are people I know, but he was one of the few people I really knew.
I need Sally to come on MSN tonight, I need us to connect, we don’t have to be boyfriend/girlfriend, but I want to be close with her, I want to share things with her. If I leave work or she does, I wants us to care enough about each other to really stay in touch, I want to know her the rest of my life. I’m begging God to build a bridge between us. She doesn’t realise how much I rely on her, if she’s at work I’m already more excited about going. I light up every time I see there’s a message waiting for me from her, and if she didn’t exist I’d feel like there was no-one to look forward to.