The ground beneath

I’ve read numerous wep pages devoted to people feeling sad, depressed or lonely and the thing that disturbs me perhaps the most is that generally these people have a love of life that has unfortunately been trampled all over.
The story that upsets me the most is the person who gets picked on for no reason. The fuckers doing that have no idea they are crushing a spirit.
As I sit here now I have no idea how to integrate myself into society and now idea of how to feel connected.
What has happened recently has cast me aside even further. At one point I thought I was made and that things were going to pick up because I wouldn’t be alone anymore.
And now look.
I thought Nina was going to save me, I really did. I thought I’d wake up every morning intoxicated & motivated by her companionship. Instead, she’s with her boyfriend…who I met on a drunken night out AND who I got on very well with. Which makes it worse because now I feel guilty that we kissed and my heart knows that those two are going to stay together. I always wondered if it was just a drunken action by her and now I know it was.
So I see my heroine fly away with someone else and I’m left flapping and floundering on the ground.