Produced by Dr. Dre

Still can’t handle groups ya know.
It was the monthly team meeting and I knew everyone there but I could still feel…the fear.
1 by 1 the others sat around the early birds who were already there. I noticed my hand begin to shake. And I mean really shake, like I was having a fit or something. My throat tightened up and I started to sweat.
The meeting progressed and whenever the focus was on me, my face went bright red asif I was sweating blood.
Infact, I was so nervous at one point, I think I actually did started to sweat blood. Well it felt like it anyway.
I wrote a post about how I had proclaimed myself as new supervisor and ripped into the others. Today was the revenge.
And it was bad. Sweet old ladies transformed into vicious vultures, tearing into me like a piece of fresh meat.
It was excruciating.
Everyone got a dig at me.
And it lasted an hour!
They mocked my facial hair for God sake. MY FACIAL HAIR.
They insinuated that I can barely grow any…which they are correct, but it is still a very sensitive issue for me!
Seriously though, I was angry with myself for not being able to fight back. It was like a force had taken over my body that wouldn’t allow me to relax and just enjoy it.
I would have killed them aswell…like I always do when there is less people at once.
Thoughts of this week:
1. Wish I was more intelligent. I feel very limited at the mo.
2. Wish I was better looking.
3. At last I’m getting more sleep!
4. Ashes! Ashes! Ashes!