The underclass

I was feeling a bit rough yesterday. Worrying about lack of friends. But that’s all it was. It wasn’t a deep hurt it was just making me feel a bit down.
All I had to do was make it through today’s shift and I was out of work for a whole week.
Unfortunately Adam had other plans.
I was humiliated, made fun of and embarrassed at work today.
Every insult made me even more quiet.
Oh God it was terrible. I haven’t been ripped on like that since second school. I feel good about that workplace, so good that I actually recommended it to someone at college. But I don’t think I’ll be doing anything like that again.
I hated the way he involved everyone. I could almost see their respect for me fly out of the window.
The things he said were absolutely cutting. They were laced with the truth maybe.
I was always kind of scared that someone like him would join work.
It’s like a successful football team signs a new player who completely disrupts the rest of them.
Except they all seem to love him.
The things he said I just haven’t been able to get out my head. They keep coming back to me. At one point he launched into a tirade about my spots. Talking about how I’ll never meet a girl. I went off for a break and he just said with absolute conviction…. “God you are so ugly.”
I don’t understand why people are so motivated to cut others down?
He told Melissa how I had said I wanted to do something sexually explicit to her. I hadn’t said it but he told her. Of course she took the easy option and believed him. She knew he was lying but it was much easier to join in on the fun.
I felt like just throwing myself into traffic when I left work. I really feel as though I’ve been shattered.
I couldn’t say anything back. There was no confidence what so ever. He brought other people into it which just added to the humiliation. I couldn’t defend myself. So not only did I feel completely battered but I felt like a wimp too. If you knew me though you would know that I am the least confrontational guy ever. I simply do not want any trouble. If I have an argument with someone I end up worrying about it all night.
I’m basically no good with words under pressure like that. It’s pathetic in this day and age but I’m just as quiet as a mouse.
I guess conflict is unavoidable.
Ah man the things he said really hurt and everyone laughed and I just sat there and took it. My body froze and my mind was on empty.