I know i'll never lose affection

After every Friday lesson at college I always feel like this.
Ya know what I want to do more than anything tonight?
Just go to the pub with a couple of mates. But there’s no one available to do that with. And it gets to me on Fridays because that’s the time I feel I really want to.
I just want to get merry and have a few laughs. But there is no-one.
My 18 year old mate is off with his mates tonight….to the pub. He has people calling him on his phone throughout the day to find out what he’s doing whereas I’m lucky if I get a text message other than fucking vodafone.
I just wanna have pals to go out with. And usually I’m ok up until Friday/Saturday and then I get that sinking feeling.
Ya know I don’t feel depressed about it, it just hurts a little.
But heck, we all have things that hurt a little right?

Dennis the menace. Lol that's shit

Today was fun. Work was fun.
I was loud and goofy.
I’m sure it pissed a lot of people off but I just feel asif all restraints have been lifted off me recently.
And I had to express that in exceptionally childish behaviour.
I’m talking about making paper airplanes and chucking them at people and then looking away all innocent like.
I met my new manager for the first time today and I spent 15 minutes laughing at her because she’s off to see take that.
And I was very cheeky with all the girls!

Thinking of your love

Things with Anna fizzled out as expected. Expected because it was unrealistic to expect a long-term future with someone married.
My good news is that I seem to be handling certain little things that last year would have destroyed me.
Things like people leaving etc which would have paralysed me last term have not had the same effect upon me. I’m a lot happier because of it.
And generally I am quite happy.
I will be applying for university next year. I will be 22 and I think capable of achieving success there. The only problem is this next year.
It will be a bitch. Things will be very quiet socially and I’m not sure how to fill the time.
Football manager perhaps? Maybe.
This summer is quite a daunting prospect too. It is at that kind of time that I wish I had friends…but never mind.
There is no point wailing about something that is not going to fall into my lap. The realistic view is that I will make friends at university…until then it is all about enjoying the time I have in whatever way possible.
And ya know that’s a pretty good position to be in. I’m not tied down with debt or bad relationships…I can just simply…live.